Every DAY is Mental Health Awareness DAY here at Ava’s Corner…as we try to help those of us who are challenged with our brains’ alternate states to define “normal” one person at a time…and often one minute at a time.
YOUR best normal is what you should strive for (not someone else’s definition of that) and, when life throws you a curve ball, find that new normal for you to try to maintain.
My normal before Ava Kauffman’s death was being on the phone with her any time of the day or night helping her stay focused on completing her degree and encouraging her to think past the moment of depression into a positive future. However, my life after that horrific phone call at 6:00 AM on March 23rd changed my “normal” forever. I now struggle with PTSD as a result of 40 years of cumulative angst, pain, anxiety and struggle to help my son help himself to stay alive (he was murdered), help Ava stay alive (she killed herself) and, finally, help my 90+ year old Mom stay alive in her last years.
Carl, Ava and me April 1984
Mom watching fireworks from my deck in 2011…before the world stopped spinning.
The difference? As a mother, you ALWAYS have HOPE that prayers, hard work in helping your children, etc. will help them see a brighter tomorrow. When ALL fails and the most important people in your life are all gone…critical support team, best friends, loved ones…some of us struggle.
People who don’t really “know” me think I’m strong and dumber ones have asked me if Montana was one of those “fake” service dogs. That’s about the time they might just find out exactly why I have her! Word of caution! Don’t ask that!
Remember, you don’t always “see” who we are but that doesn’t make us whole! It makes us in a constant state of healing. The trick is finding YOUR very own way of creative coping and healing!
Montana is MY creative coping mechanism. I could leave the house without her!
from a Friend 
The truth of this is so beautiful and humane and well written from someone I cherish more than words can ever express and the strength yet vulnerablilty of it so profound and a guiding light always. So grateful for you in my life ! Thanks for sharing this with us :’ )
Thank you sweet chirren of mine! I’m touched to sweet tears at your beautiful, heartfelt response. I couldn’t not write this short post because it’s been in my soul, formulating for about a month. Love you to Sirius and back!